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I am in introvert. I am truly much happier keeping to myself, but as a writer I've noticed that sometimes this bites me in the ass. Social media is one example of this.

My main avenue of social media is Facebook. I've found it is easier to "socialize" on that platform with people I know (my personal Facebook page for example). It's kind of a conundrum because introverts don't tend to like face to face interactions, and online all that face to face stress is removed. Even so, I tend to keep to myself.

I suppose there are several reasons for this. First of all, I really don't like to draw attention to myself, even if it's positive. I know that seems strange, but that is a deep-seated truth about me. Second, I feel like I have a limited amount of time for online things because I have a busy and somewhat tiring "real life." (Plus, I'm old, so I get tired more easily). And third, I've always felt socially awkward...I'm the kind of person who will say the wrong thing, and everyone ends up staring at me. To avoid that I keep my mouth shut. But then, that goes back to the first point, if I say something that everyone finds amusing, or deep, then I begin to feel uncomfortable that I'm the center of attention.

Facebook claims that without promoting your posts you will engage 15% of your friends. I find that to be an exaggeration. When I don't promote my posts, I engage far less than 15% of the 609 "likes" I have. The only time I do engage 15% is when I can manage to get people to respond to my posts, and that's not very often.

Lately, in order to mollify myself, I've been thinking of it in these terms. Back in the '80s I had time to read, primarily because there was no ready access to the Internet (the Internet sucks up extra time for me). My favorite author at that time was Roberta Gellis. I devoured all her books, reading them several times just for the sheer joy of her characters, the situations, and the wonderful language of her historical romances. I became obsessed, I wanted to read every single book she had ever written. I managed to find most of them, but there were three I could never find, her first three. I looked at many bookstores (back then, before Amazon, there were lots of bookstores) including a store that specialized in historical romances. Nothing, I could not find the books anywhere. In desperation, I wrote a letter (an actual letter, mailed with an actual stamp) to the publisher. I got a response too! They told me the books were out of print and no longer available. Disheartened, I gave up.

And then one day I was shopping at an outlet mall. There was a bargain bookstore there, and lo and behold they had all three books, and they were new! I was thrilled!!! Of course, I devoured them too, and joy of joy they were all medieval!

So, my point is this. I was a RABID Roberta Gellis fan, but she never knew it. I didn't write online reviews for her books, obviously because there was no "online." I didn't sent her fan mail, and I didn't have access to her at all. To mollify myself, I tell myself that I have fans like that out there in the world. True or not, it makes me feel better.


( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
Dec. 9th, 2012 05:20 am (UTC)
I think all authors have a #1 fan out there, that he/she will stand outside the bookstore and wait for that book that will be out that same day or know that when their clock hit midnight, they be able to buy that eBook they were waiting for. I know I have done it :D

And I really believe you have one, even if s/he doesn't let you know :) *hugs*

Dec. 9th, 2012 06:38 am (UTC)

I'm sure I do...and it's heartening to me to think that other people are sure about it too.

( 2 comments — Leave a comment )